Sleep and other stuff at night.
Well, i'm much more active at night. Wait, it sounded wrong. I'm a night person if it wasn't obvious already. At night is when i'm usually up watching movies, tv series, or whatever downloaded stuff that i've got. I've been sleeping at 6 or 7am for the past few days or maybe week. I'm not really sure anymore. But then tonight, dad woke up at 4.40 or so and sat me down and we had a chat. And it got me thinking a little.
He started off by asking why i was always up til early morning or not sleep at all. and i explained myself that i was up watching movies and stuff. But then he asked a question that kinda struck a nerve.
(Obviously i translated everything to english or maybe singlish)
dad: did something happened between you and me? you don't share stuff with me anymore.
me: nah, we're cool. there's nothing to share.
dad: you sure? cause your brother said something a little different.
me: well thank you brothers then. yeah, we don't share anything because you don't seem to listen anymore. i tell my brothers because they don't judge me.
dad: i don't judge you either.why would i judge my own daughter. that is stupid laa. seriously. why would you not tell me thing thats happening to you anymore?
me: oh really? its 5am in the morning, its not exactly how i planned the start of my day but let me clear the air here. i'm up all night because i'm on tumblr and twitter and blogging. which i find much better for myself. blogging helps me takes some pressure off my myself. and i'm on tumblr because it nice to know that there is someone out there that goes through the exact same shit and their surviving. At least they tell me i can survive as well! because all we ever talk about is how i'm suppose to graduate poly and be as successful as my god damn brothers. i mean come on, i'm not all study and no fun. i'm a teenager and you gotta be more understanding.
Okay the last thing, i said it all in english. I don't really care anymore. I mean i find online sites and other people much more understanding than my own parents. And i'm losing sleep cause its all i think about at night. Not because i wanna be awake and be on this sites. I mean come on, in the day, you look your parents in the eye and you are dying to tell them that something is wrong. And you're about to spill the beans about it and your parents turn away and stare at the tv instead. I mean if they can't even hold a five minute conversation, how are they suppose to sit with you for a whole hour and listen to everything you gotta share. Its ridiculous. I don't even know why i lose sleep for this kinda things. But nowadays, i find myself awake alot, like tonight.
He started off by asking why i was always up til early morning or not sleep at all. and i explained myself that i was up watching movies and stuff. But then he asked a question that kinda struck a nerve.
(Obviously i translated everything to english or maybe singlish)
dad: did something happened between you and me? you don't share stuff with me anymore.
me: nah, we're cool. there's nothing to share.
dad: you sure? cause your brother said something a little different.
me: well thank you brothers then. yeah, we don't share anything because you don't seem to listen anymore. i tell my brothers because they don't judge me.
dad: i don't judge you either.why would i judge my own daughter. that is stupid laa. seriously. why would you not tell me thing thats happening to you anymore?
me: oh really? its 5am in the morning, its not exactly how i planned the start of my day but let me clear the air here. i'm up all night because i'm on tumblr and twitter and blogging. which i find much better for myself. blogging helps me takes some pressure off my myself. and i'm on tumblr because it nice to know that there is someone out there that goes through the exact same shit and their surviving. At least they tell me i can survive as well! because all we ever talk about is how i'm suppose to graduate poly and be as successful as my god damn brothers. i mean come on, i'm not all study and no fun. i'm a teenager and you gotta be more understanding.
Okay the last thing, i said it all in english. I don't really care anymore. I mean i find online sites and other people much more understanding than my own parents. And i'm losing sleep cause its all i think about at night. Not because i wanna be awake and be on this sites. I mean come on, in the day, you look your parents in the eye and you are dying to tell them that something is wrong. And you're about to spill the beans about it and your parents turn away and stare at the tv instead. I mean if they can't even hold a five minute conversation, how are they suppose to sit with you for a whole hour and listen to everything you gotta share. Its ridiculous. I don't even know why i lose sleep for this kinda things. But nowadays, i find myself awake alot, like tonight.
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