Love. Heartbreak. Letting go. Start over.

“Letting go means to come to the realization that some people are a part of your history, but not a part of your destiny.” ― Steve Maraboli

Yeah yeah, everyone falls in love. Mr Perfect, Ms Right, whatever you guys call it. But we all started all from starting we call our first love. Best thing ever, hardest to forget, can't help but to compare the rest to them. But everytime something goes wrong, the cycle stay the same.

LOVE, HEARTBREAK, LETTING GO, START OVER. 

Yes, even this girl who basically spends half her time doing work has been through this before. I met a guy, charming as a prince, lovely as a butterfly, made me feel like the only girl in the world. But we were too young, too childish to want to make it work. But nevertheless, he was my first love. We started as friends, then somewhere along the way, we became best friends and we talked everyday. Then we were in the same class for 2 years and he treated me like I was some princess. He'd randomly smile at me, make funny faces when I'm down, he was the best I could ever ask for. But just like I said, we went our separate ways. But despite that, we are still best friends today. Probably closer than ever.

Just like any other human being, I moved on from it. I let it go, grew up. I met another guy, a few. Had a few broken hearts after probably because I could not help but wished they all treated me like how my first love did. But since then, I grew up even more. I told myself to start brand new. And I did. I fell in love but he just wasn't Mr Right. But who the hell knows what Mr Right is supposed to be like right?

We girls have all these ideas about them being a certain height, they need to be lean and buff, their hair needs to be styled a certain way, he needs to dress a certain way, he needs to talk a certain way, everything is well planned out. But we never really get what we want, do we?

I'm recovering from a bad break up and every night it haunts my thoughts. It engulfs me like a plague every night. And today, just as this post come out, I'm starting over. I've been worried about my break up but somehow i found comfort in some guy. And I wish he knew. But just like always, when you like someone you can't tell them, Cause if you do, they'd just totally stop talking to you. Isn't that what we worry about? And when we don't tell them, they won't know and we'll miss a chance of ever telling them how we feel. But then again, I don't have the guts to tell the guy either. So I'll just let him be comfort as I claw myself out and start fresh.

But guys remember, its better letting things go. Simply because if you keep it all in, it becomes heavy. And when something is heavy, it weighs you down. I always think of it as having weights on my ankles. I'd rather free myself from it than having them tied around my ankles.